Its just different...

So I am 22 weeks pregnant with my second child, a little girl. We are so excited to be having another child, but this pregnancy is so different.

For my first pregnancy, we had tried 2 and a half years to have a baby. We went to Ohio to visit friends and on the way home Hopson and I prayed for a baby, but told the Lord that He was enough. Even if He didn't allow us to have a child. Little did we know that I was already pregnant. I went to the doctor for a blood test and when the doctor called me with the results, I couldn't even answer the phone. My husband called the doctor back and told me that I was pregnant. I had horrible panic attacks and anxiety with my first pregnancy. I also had gestational diabetes. My skin cleared up a ton and my hair grew really long and fast and thick. My nails were also great!

This time it is so different. I have had no anxiety or panic attacks, which has been great. I also haven't had a great complexion, hair, or nails. I am not sure if it is because I am having a girl this time or not, but that's ok!

Those aren't the only differences. This pregnancy is going by SO fast! I am already past the halfway point! And my excitement is completely different. I am so thankful we are having a girl, but it has hit me that I will be teaching her everything. How to be a wife, a mother, a woman. I will be teaching her how to do her makeup and hair. How to cook and clean. It all seems overwhelming!

I also am concerned about taking away from my son. I spend so much time with him and I don't want him to feel unloved or left out. I know that before I had him there was no way I could comprehend the love that I would have for him, so I am hoping it is the same way with my baby girl.

I know that when the time comes for her to be here, God will give me the strength to love both of my children and to parent both of them, but this waiting period certainly is different!! Anybody else ever have feelings like this?